Assertiveness
Last night I spent time with other providers that do preschool that same way I do ( in a home ) and we delved into chapter 3 of our Conscious Discipline book. Each month we are spending extra time studying ( what we have already spent 6 days in a workshop being taught ) and learning from each other as we implement the skills in our classroom. The same skills we are learning as teachers we are teaching to our preschoolers. The first month was composure. Remember us teaching the STAR technique ? ( Smile, Take a Deep Breath and Relax ) The second chapter the skill was encouragement . This is where we added the morning greeting and all the little routines through the day that make us feel part of a family . ( songs, we wish you well ) The skill we are adding this month is Assertiveness. Being assertive helps the child know boundaries….. his and those around him. Example: If you say ” Will you please pick up the trucks from the living room floor?” You are being passive and leaving an option open to the child. Being passive often ends up in frustration because we thought the child would do ” what is right.” We also learned that there are aggressive approaches that just cause fear. Example : Get in the livingroom and pick up all those trucks or you cannot play outside. The assertive statement would be ” Go to the livingroom and pick up the trucks. ” Direct and to the point is less confusing and not fearful. If the child does not move you lightly place your hand on the shoulder to guide them in the right direction. When they start picking up you say ” You did it. You are picking up the trucks ! ” Thats an example as a parent or a teacher. Now, lets look at how we teach the children how to be assertive .
Who has been bullied ?
I helped Danielle do a lot of research on bullying and travelled all over the state as she stoke to student groups against bullying .Even as a beautiful cheerleader she was bullied. ( Shameless plug – AETN ” Leave me Alone” has her story that sometimes is still aired .) Teacher intervention is sometimes needed but we want children to learn to be assertive so they can stop the bullying . We want to teach them that WORDS HAVE POWER.
Is there a lot of tattle- telling goes on in your house ? I am going to encourage you to handle it like we do at school – by using assertiveness.
Child- He hit me!
Adult – Did you like it ? ( Teaching the child to understand WHY they are coming for help )
Child – No
Adult – It hurt didnt it? I want you to go tell him ” Do not hit me. It hurts when you hit.” Repeat after me ” Do not hit, It hurts when you hit.” Have child repeat and if it isnt in a big strong voice you repeat it with a strong voice and say ” Make your voice match mine.” Child repeats and then child goes with the adult to the ” hitter ” and repeats the phrase to them. The adult is there to make sure the ” hitter” doest retaliate and that the child that was hurt feels empowered to use his words to take care of himself.
The picture below is Ms Dallas talking with Carter about using his big voice when someone grabbed his arm.
What a wonderful world it would be if we all felt like we could use our words to let others know when they hurt us, whether physically or emotionally.
We read a book about Shubert who found his ” big voice ” to use when Benny took the apple Shubert had for his teacher. I was afraid the books that go along with Conscious Discipline would be too long for our kiddos but they are hanging in there !
We did more assessments today. We did gross motor skills in the playground. Can your child skip ? We also jumped up to see who could land on two feet and hopped up and down on one foot. These skills really cant be taught . They develop as the child gets older and more agile. ( Side note, did you know that fine motor skills – writing – are directly connected to gross motor skills ? That is why outside time is so important to these guys ! )
I cooked homemade fried rice for the kids lunch today and 99% of them LOVED it. Here is the recipe if you need it. I added lean ground beef.
2 (8.8-oz) pouches microwaveable brown rice
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 tablespoon canola oil
1 cup frozen peas and carrots, thawed
3 tablespoons low-sodium soy sauce
Cook rice according to package directions. Heat a medium nonstick skillet coated with cooking spray over medium-high heat. Add eggs to pan; cook 11⁄2 minutes or until set. Remove eggs from pan, and coarsely chop. Brown Lean beef. . Add peas and carrots to pan; saute 2 minutes. Add soy sauce . Add cooked rice to pan; cook 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Add egg ; cook 30 seconds, stirring constantly
And of course we had to have fortune cookies !
Since we are talking about our bodies this week Ms Dallas weighed and measured each of the kiddos this morning. Its amazing how much they grow in one year.
